The Real Housewives are often involved in relatable situations — such as divorce, family problems, or illnesses — but are rarely relatable themselves. Of course, they might feel anxious about seeing a former spouse (or his first wife) in public, but they can find relief in their private jets.
Heather Gay, however, is different. She’s the easygoing, fun-loving woman who brings a much-needed feeling of normalcy to The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Remember when she awoke on a girls’ trip in a pile of unwrapped Milk Duds or when she vomited into a plastic bag while riding in a Sprinter van? While she may be seen wearing Gucci corsets and Louis Vuitton handbags, it is still easy to picture yourself sharing a few tequila sodas with her at a neighborhood bar. (It goes without saying that she has never requested a drink “carcass out.”)
Gay, 51, tells Us Weekly exclusively for the annual Reality Stars of the Year issue, “I would say our talents are unseen and difficult to express, but they are there, and you either have them or you don’t. You must be alert. The strays must be caught by you. You must throw them back. You must be able to voice your opinion in intense circumstances while being filmed, which is challenging if you know what to say. It is a million times harder if you have no clue what to say.”
As Bravo viewers are aware, Gay undoubtedly possesses “it.” She is the one who caused the most dramatic event in RHOSLC history: the season 4 exposure of former costar Monica Garcia as the brains behind the Reality Von Tease gossip website. The scene in which she delivered the news to a windblown Meredith Marks, Whitney Rose, and Lisa Barlow on a beach in Bermuda has achieved legendary status in reality television, with Bravo executive Andy Cohen himself telling Us that it was “one of the best single episodes of television in Bravo history.”
Heather Gay Chad Kirkland
For months, rumors circulated that something so excellent could not have been unscripted, but Gay asserts that it was.
She clarifies, “I am naturally a storyteller. It simply comes from my lips. But I had been thinking for the previous several hours about how I would explain everything to my friends because I was piecing it together myself. … I couldn’t stop thinking, “How am I going to explain this? What actually occurred? How am I going to explain it, and will they comprehend?” once I knew I was going to tell them.”
Gay was hailed as a hero at that point, but her time on RHOSLC hasn’t always been so positive. Some fans turned against her after she first lied about what caused her black eye in season 2, while others have called her a mean girl. More recently, she has received criticism for her weight loss, which she freely acknowledges was partly caused by Ozempic. She responds, “Every day,” when asked if she ever considers leaving the show.
Gay continues, “You consider quitting just like you hate your job, your friends, or your spouse or partner. I believe it is a normal human reaction. When things become difficult, stressful, or overwhelming, or when you’re not getting along, you think, “I can walk away from all of this and just have peace.”
Heather Gay, Lisa Barlow, Meredith Marks, Whitney Rose, Mary Cosby, Bronwyn Newport and Angie Katsanevas. Chad Kirkland
Gay hasn’t given up just yet, but she has many other options if she ever does. She is the owner of the medspa Beauty Lab + Laser and the author of two books (the memoirs Bad Mormon and Good Time Girl), and she recently signed a contract for four novellas and a “long, romantic thriller.”
Her first two books were partially about leaving The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which she did years after being married in the temple and having three daughters. She claims that she gets “great satisfaction” from discussing her experience and that she wants to “represent hope for people after Mormonism, especially for women after Mormonism, to represent a different path, and to shine a light on harmful practices that we have never been able to discuss.”
Gay’s books prove that she wasn’t actually the “good time girl” that Barlow once claimed she was, but she is trying to make up for lost time. With her youngest child in college, Gay is once again dating and spending some time concentrating on her new role as an empty-nester.
She clarifies, “[I want to] just date freely. Have men pick me up, have men drop me off. Host gatherings, invite friends over, and serve drinks. My girls were very cool, mature, and encouraging, so I could have done all of that with them. It was all about me. I simply couldn’t be both a girlfriend and a mother at the same time, and I was just focused on raising my children. The motherly aspect completely overshadowed any desire for dating, but now I feel as though the lights are on, and I’m eager to date and enjoy a little me time, which I’m really enjoying.”
The cast of ‘RHOSLC’ channels ABC’s ‘Desperate Housewives’ for Us Weekly’s Reality Stars of the Year issue. PHOTOGRAPHY BY CHAD KIRKLAND. PROP STYLING BY HILLARY KIRKLAND. SHOT AT WEST MAIN STUDIO, SLC. CGI BACKGROUND BY JUSTIN METZ.
Gay doesn’t believe the accusation that she has gotten meaner as she has gotten skinnier, but she does think that people may be viewing her differently.
She claims that “any time a pretty girl stands up for herself, she’s a bitch. When you are heavier and lead with humor and self-deprecation, you are much less intimidating. I’m just as outspoken now as I was when I was 30 pounds heavier, yet it somehow seems harsher when the packaging is less threatening.”
If anything, Gay intends to defend herself even more.
She says, reflecting on her journey since season 1, “I have far more limits now than I did then, and I have also been sorely betrayed by women on this show and by friends. Therefore, I was more harsh to Bronwyn [Newport] when she arrived than I would have been five years ago because I’ve been burned, and that affects how I interact with others. I still like making friends, and I still make an effort to be kind. But the past six years have certainly made me a bit tougher, more cynical, and, hopefully, a little wiser to the ways of the world.”
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City is broadcast on Bravo on Tuesdays at 8 p.m. ET. Watch previous episodes whenever you want on Peacock.
Get the new issue of Us Weekly, which is available on newsstands right now, to learn more about Gay and the other Reality Stars of the Year.
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